Transcript of a speech delivered to Phase 1 Group from a participant who has recently completed Phase 2, Term 2 2008.
Hello, as I said before my name is Greg, and I have completed phase one and I am currently doing phase two, which I am hoping to redo, not because I’m not getting it, but because I believe that I can get a whole lot more out of redoing phase two.
I would like to congratulate each of you for firstly taking the biggest step to getting yourselves back on the right track, and that is coming here. Admitting you have a problem that needs fixing is one of the hardest things you will ever do, I know that it is probably the one hardest thing I have ever done. And secondly for continuing to turn up each week. When I first started I thought I was in the wrong place that his isn’t for me I don’t have anger / abusive issues, boy was I wrong, each week things were bought up and I would think to myself “fuck I do that, that’s me all over”. Are David and Tanya spying on me, do that have hidden cameras at my place? How do they know that’s what goes on? Scary I know.
Doing this programme has not only helped me become a different person, but has also made me a better much stronger person. The thing that I have found, and all the other guy’s, in phase two is that you have to be honest with yourself, and be honest with the others in your group. I liken it to a football team, where you rely on your teammates to help you out and they rely on you to help them. It’s not a game you can play on your own. You need the support of everyone to make you a better player. Same here, you need the support of the other people around you to make you a better person. If you have a stuff up, acknowledge it, accept it, own it. It makes a huge difference to the way you act and feel.
I now feel I have more confidence in the things I say and do, the way I act and react to different situations now is a full one-eighty degree turn around to what I was before. With the tools I now have in place, I am able to STOP, ASSESS, TAKE APART and THINK about my responses and actions. Being put in the HOT seat has helped a lot with that. Having to take ownership and being responsible for my actions is a lot harder than what it sound. Actually being put on the spot, dumped in the shit by DAVID has been a real wake up call. My two daughters are the ones that have kept me focused as well as my parents and family and closest friends. I found it a huge relief and a weight off my shoulders when I sat my parents down and actually told them what I was doing to change my behaviour. Don’t be afraid to tell you family and close friends what you are involving yourselves in (the programme).
My family, especially my two daughters and mum and dad have noticed a huge change in my moods, behaviour and whole attitude towards life now that I have been doing this programme. That, along with a lot of one on one sessions with David (just when things don’t seem to be going as I would like them to be), these sessions along with the support from the other guy’s in the group are what has made the big changes. The feeling of not being judged by others is a big thing on the road to changing. If anyone is not feeling like they are getting through and feel like things are getting on top of you, get in touch with David and use the one on one service he provides. Believe me, it does help. The other thing that I have gotten out of the programme is that there are so many males out there that are battling, that same as I am, and it is still a battle some days. I thought I was the only one with issues, problems, mood swings, but taking a look around the room I can own why I am here and I know that all of you should be able to own why you are here too. The thing I realised is that I don’t have to face this alone.
I am a changed person, thanks to David and Tanya and all the other guys here that have helped me as I have helped them to see the errors in our ways. Outside of here it is me who I have to thank and my family for keeping me focused and heading down the right road, the road that feels very uncomfortable when I am on it, when we are all on it. I strongly encourage all of you to continue on the journey to happiness, and I you feel you need to do your phase again, whether it is phase one or two or even three, do it! Things aren’t going to change over night; it is not a race to get to the other end. As I have found, change take time, and in this situation I have plenty of time to make sure I get it right.
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