A poem from Dennis in Doncaster, Victoria - 2004
I finally faced up to my abusive and violent behaviour.
I wanted to make a change so I met David and Louise and a group of other changing minds.
David and Louise and participating colleges made me realize different definitions of violence, and the cycle of violence.
You taught me a great deal. You made me aware of a greater deal.
How to take time-out. The 4RRRR's!! Recognize, Remove, Refocus and Retry.
You taught me to be more respectful, and "STOP", ask yourself questions and relax.
You taught me to make a change by 'Thought Stacking' and that Positive thoughts, lead to positive feelings which leads to a positive changing mind and behaviour.
You made me realize what a paradox is; "and the minute you don't want power, control, or the last word - actually gives you more."
You taught me to recognize the difference between a power triangle and a healing triangle.
You taught me ways to be an effective listener and caring listener.
You taught me this in 12 sessions because I noticed you actually listen to me and my colleges in this manner. Your example made me realize that listening is the ultimate compliment.
At the end of each session you asked me to give a feeling word - sometimes it was confusing, frustrated, lonely, thoughtful, withdrawn, and sometimes anxious, confident. But! I always left feeling that I am heading in the right direction.
For this I thank you David and Louise for all the above, and a special thank you to all the guys for sharing your experiences and allowing me to share mine.
If I really hear your message I may change behaviour and changing minds.
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